Tuesday, May 15, 2018

Mother's Day 2018

I've said this on here before, but Mother's Day is not my favorite holiday of the year. Back when Chris and I were going through years and years of infertility, Mother's Day was very difficult for obvious reasons. Back then, I thought that having children would take away all those feelings and emotions brought on by infertility. However, I quickly learned how untrue that was. The emotions morphed (and continue to change), but there are still so many bittersweet feelings surrounding Mother's Day for me. Add in that we have also suffered four losses, and everything becomes even more complicated. I often feel like I'm walking a fine line between giving my emotions and grief the space and attention they need, and truly soaking up every moment that I'm given with my living babies. I am so incredibly grateful for my family, but that doesn't erase the pain and grief that we've suffered getting to this place. 

With all that said, I wanted to keep Mother's Day simple this year. I wanted to just spend time with my family and truly drink in the moments that I longed for for so many years. Because of this, we decided to stay home this year for Mother's Day instead of going to my parents' house like we typically do. 

Chris planned a fun dinner and evening on Saturday. I love that he made shish kabobs on the grill . . . my whole plate looked like summer!

We ate outside on our back patio. The temperature was perfect, but the wind was blustery!

After dinner, the kids helped Daddy make a fire to enjoy. 

Of course, we had to have s'mores for dessert since we had a fire!

Brenson and Brianna

Brooke and Brecklyn

I'm so thankful that Chris understands what a trigger Mother's Day can be for me. He truly worked to make it special but kept it simple and low-key . . . exactly what I needed this year.

On Sunday (actual Mother's Day), we got around early before church so I could open a few gifts. The kids are always so cute and proud to give me gifts, but they especially love showing me the work they did in my Mother's Day book. This is definitely my favorite part of Mother's Day, and I think it's theirs, too!

Brooke

This is the photo that Brooke and Daddy put in my book for me.

Love my Brooke Ellie!

Brecklyn showing me the work she did in my book.

This is the photo of Brecklyn and me that's in the book.

I adore my sweet Brecklyn!

Brenson made a few little things at school for me.

This is the photo of us that he put in my book.

My boy has my heart!

Brianna loves giving gifts.

I'm grateful beyond words for my big girl!

This is the photo that Brianna chose for my book.

After the kids showed me my book and gave me gifts, Chris had a few gifts for me as well. One gift was a bracelet "from" our angel babies. He's never done something like that before, and I just cherish that bracelet so much!

💓

He also gifted me this purse that I picked out and purchased a few weeks before :-). Good job, honey, it's exactly what I wanted, haha!

That morning, Mom and Dad traveled down to Oklahoma for Dad to preach for us. Not only was this Mother's Day, but it was Mom's birthday as well. I knew the restaurants would be crazy, and I wasn't really feeling up for going out with a crowd. Instead, I cooked a ham and sides for lunch, and we invited Mom, Dad, Russ, Lisa, and Chloe Jo over for lunch at our place. This was different as we typically eat out on Sundays, but it ended up being a really good change! It was so nice to have a low-key meal where we could visit, all sit together, and give gifts easily.

My Mom continues to teach me so much about how to be a good mother. I'm so grateful for her!

Mom and her daughters

Me and my loves . . . thankful doesn't even begin to describe it!

I hope you all had a peaceful day, as I know this day isn't all smiles and joy for everyone. I'll never forget what it felt like for Mother's Day to be one of the hardest days of the year, and I spent time in prayer for all those in that place now. Happy Mother's Day 💓. 

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